Digging up Ghost and Graves

Hey guys,
So I did a LOT and I mean a ton of walking today, going down that old memory lane. I did a lost of grave robbing, and such. I found a novels worth of my old writing, and I want to have it all up here, if the date is on them I will give it, or I will try to say what it's about. I'm hoping old works will inspire some new? Maybe that naive, but whatever, I have to hold onto my hope. So here is the first.

His hand pressed against mind
His lips sitting there so perfect
His eyes that breath taking blue
His curls perfectly placed around him
That face, the skin, the hair, the smell, the warmth
Brushing my hand across that soft skin
His laugh a bell like breathing
His arms could hold the world together
Hold me as I broke my body down
Letting me break away
Letting me escape and be with him
That joy, that bliss
It makes this hell so much worse
It makes me ugly and hateful
I can't stand hating what I don't know
Because she has you and I want you
Because she can look at a face
She can hear your voice and make you happy
Where I bring only pain
I hate this feeling so weak
Because I miss you
Like half of m is gone
Like a wound that wont heal
That I keep taring at to feel
To be close to you I open it
Insides I feel so shattered
So damaged and broken like everything wrong
I've given up it's not worth this paint
Bu it's how I know
That it was real
But I still can't stand the fact that your holding her hand